Where the hell have I been?


I took this picture and my daughter did the origami. Family fun and all rights reserved.

  • Working at my new job. Funny how part time takes all your time, right?
  • Doing the summertime juggle: keeping two under-scheduled children in the air for 98 hours a week. (Wheeee!) (How does she do it?)
  • Just got back from a trip to Nevada City and the Yuba River where all I did was dip into the cold water then sizzle on a slab of hot rock. Dip and fry, dip and fry, dip and fry under the deep blue sky. (This is my brain: ^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^.)
  • Writing very weird things. And one was published! Seriously, somebody slap me: Stir Journal published something I wrote, a piece called The Billionaire Diet which struck me on the first day on my new editing job when I learned about how much money a person might conceivably earn writing about a diet. I thought I could write one of those (but then I couldn’t keep a straight face). Please click through to see the strange mud that is stirring up to my surface.
  • I also wrote another small article called How to Make Friends with Crows which I recommend for anyone who’s interested in the neighborhood crows.
  • Reading Madness, Rack, and Honey by Mary Ruefle. *Swoon.* OMFG she is so good it hurts. You should see my copy–completely warped, disintegrating at the edges, tea-stained, dog-eared, splayed like a soggy bird, covered with licks and lipsticky nibbles. I need nothing more in life but this book forever, over and over. Mary Ruefle: I am yours.  Your word is my mantra.
  • We stayed one night at the oldest continually-running hotel in California, a place where Mark Twain once slept, and I’m sure he stayed in the same room we did, in the exact same bed, on the same mattress even (it was at least 100 years old, that mattress) and I had a plot dream. Because that’s how my plots come to me: in dreams. And I’m not sure if this dream-idea is quite novel-length but it is very interesting and I waited a long time for it and I managed to scribble it on the back of a menu I found on the bedside table so I’m jumping up and down but very, very softly because I don’t want to scare it away.

Please, please GO SEE THE WEIRD THING I WROTE, at least to show the nice people who decided to run it that I have a friend or two and they didn’t make a mistake.

Where the hell have you been?

About Anna Fonté

Girl in the Hat, aka Anna Fonté, is an author who writes about invisibility, outsider status, everyday monsters, and her attempts to befriend the neighborhood crows. The things she writes want you to look at them.


  1. Todd

    Yeah, really, I was wondering that too… where the hell you’ve been with my GIH fix?!
    Thought maybe you went all corporate with yer new gig and kicked us slobbering sycophants to the curb. Wow, that thing sounds neat. I wonder if people would pay to read about the bumbling machinations of a of a bubble-eyed salesman bouncing through the gauntlet of greater L.A? Kind of Don Quixote played by a really dumb Machiavelli selling vinyl siding. Yuba river sounds great. We went camping up in the mountains too and caught some trout in a beautiful stream. That origami is cool… definitely worth more than $1.25!

    • They do revenue sharing from advertisements and it seems like a fair model. Many people make money by posting there (but I should also say that it’s not the place you’ll find fiction–non-fiction how-tos, mostly). It’s normal for me to have less time for writing during the summer, when kids are breathing down my neck, but also true that I haven’t quite figured out how to fit the job in edgewise without losing my creative focus. My big girl did the origami. She’s such a smarty.

  2. Love this little Anna-capsule 🙂 Add me to your “keeping the girls occupied” schedule anytime!

  3. Mike

    It is true, I was, in fact, wondering, just yesterday, what is up with Anna?

  4. Hi GITH, Glad to see your PT job allows you to eat healthy, lots of greens – – – a gem of a diet.

    I’ve been here ——> http://waldotomosky.wordpress.com/2014/07/03/i-am-so-happy-that-i-almost-wet-myself/

  5. Congratulations on the article. Great job!

  6. What ??? You got time for kids ???????? Thanks for the update, Anna.

  7. KB

    a)Read the article. hmmm. I like that it made me pause. Maybe you could link it to Tiffany’s or other high end ads? or is that too ironic? There is probably something richer than that anyway. b)Yeah I remember the juggling. I felt I could apply and be successful as a cruise ship director after planning summers. . c)2 part time jobs = more than fulltime. d)My family of crows is coming back often this summer. They will let me get within 2-3 feet of them. . . e)Thanks for the check-in, was missing you.

    • Maybe I could make fake ads for really, really disgusting and expensive items on A***** or E***. That would be so fun!
      Maaan. I can’t wait for school to start.
      I wish I could get that close. My crows are the cagiest, most suspicious creatures I’ve ever met (part of their charm, for sure).

  8. just back myself …

  9. Very excited for the dream idea. Quietly excited, so as not to scare it away. Clapping with mittens.

    (We missed you.)

  10. Part time will take over your life ( fight that!) Your river trip sounds delightful. (great descriptions)
    You’ve been really busy – the best writing starts when you’re asleep…really.

  11. Swell to see you back! Love the diet and must pick up that madness book.

  12. Welcome back, Anna! That crow article is interesting. Seeing as how they are one of the more intelligent birds, I wonder if I should incorporate some “find a way to get this crow food out of a jar using a hairclip” game to gain their camaraderie.

  13. The origami thing is *amazing* How did you make it?

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