what you’ll need:
peanuts. boiled eggs. kitchen scraps. kibble.
keep it in your pocket or in the passenger seat. never leave home without an offering. place it in a safe place where the crow can see it and then leave. yes, leave. they don’t owe you anything.
can you tell one crow from another? not really. so you can’t discriminate. so you have to take them all on. besides, they all know each other. they are going to talk.
a dinner bell. a shake of your keys. a special whistle.
what it takes to grab their attention and let them know you’re there.
patience & vigilance.
at first, they will ignore you. after all, paranoia is all about survival. if you persist, they may develop trust.
(but if you’re looking for a bird who will be tamed, who’ll sit on your shoulder and eat from your hand, forget it. the crow will never play pet.)
always make the noise. always leave the food. always back away.
a thick skin.
be reconciled with aloofness and prepared for strange looks. from both directions. the crows will never love you and yes, people will think you’re strange. they will demand an explanation.
(this is the “how.” for the “why,” read these.)
(what special talents do you possess? will you share a pointer or a how-to here?) (for some reason, i’m reminded of that scene in The Breakfast Club where Molly Ringwald teaches the other kids how to put on lipstick without using her hands.)