Category Archives: personal essays

yellow wallpaper 1

yellow wallpaper

On the home tour, John and I stood holding hands, looking at a wall covered in splotches and splatters of plaster so thick and knubby it cast shadows in the late afternoon light. “What is that?” I wondered. “Did something

yellow wallpaper 1

yellow wallpaper

On the home tour, John and I stood holding hands, looking at a wall covered in splotches and splatters of plaster so thick and knubby it cast shadows in the late afternoon light. “What is that?” I wondered. “Did something

on the map

being a bunny

Los Angeles: “It’s mostly full of nonsense and delusion and egomania. They think they’ll be young and beautiful forever, even though most of them aren’t even young and beautiful now.” –Christopher Hitchens In 1986 I skipped off the airplane into

on the map

being a bunny

Los Angeles: “It’s mostly full of nonsense and delusion and egomania. They think they’ll be young and beautiful forever, even though most of them aren’t even young and beautiful now.” –Christopher Hitchens In 1986 I skipped off the airplane into

disco xmas

one perfect ornament

The day after Thanksgiving all four of us went to the lot and walked up and down each aisle, holding our hands out to collect the scent of the needles, breathing deep that piney resin. Three of us fell in

disco xmas

one perfect ornament

The day after Thanksgiving all four of us went to the lot and walked up and down each aisle, holding our hands out to collect the scent of the needles, breathing deep that piney resin. Three of us fell in

girl underwater

girl screwed by her own naïveté

–this is a revision I’ve been working on in my writing group.  please excuse if you’ve already seen it– When I saw the painting for the first time I thought it must be a fake. It hung on a small wall

girl underwater

girl screwed by her own naïveté

–this is a revision I’ve been working on in my writing group.  please excuse if you’ve already seen it– When I saw the painting for the first time I thought it must be a fake. It hung on a small wall

finger paint

being seen (or a swan dive into a shallow pool)

The instructions went something like this: The first row goes first. The people stand up, walk single file onto the stage, stop, and turn to face the rest of the group. They stand at the front edge of the stage

finger paint

being seen (or a swan dive into a shallow pool)

The instructions went something like this: The first row goes first. The people stand up, walk single file onto the stage, stop, and turn to face the rest of the group. They stand at the front edge of the stage

blue nest

nest

(…this post is continued from here…) Finding a place that really looks and feels like home doesn’t always happen. Most of us make do with the place we’re in but I imagine everyone must have a dream home, a perfect

blue nest

nest

(…this post is continued from here…) Finding a place that really looks and feels like home doesn’t always happen. Most of us make do with the place we’re in but I imagine everyone must have a dream home, a perfect

handprints

naked

The other day at the bookstore, a man brings a stack of items to the register. He’s jabbering intensely about the weather and fiddling with the buttons on his jacket when I notice the P*****y Magazine. The girl on the

handprints

naked

The other day at the bookstore, a man brings a stack of items to the register. He’s jabbering intensely about the weather and fiddling with the buttons on his jacket when I notice the P*****y Magazine. The girl on the

frida feet

good looker

In bed one night, John is lying next to me watching something on his laptop, something with explosions and car chases and pithy dialogue, and I’m watching comedy. We do this a lot– tandem watching, an attempt at togetherness that

frida feet

good looker

In bed one night, John is lying next to me watching something on his laptop, something with explosions and car chases and pithy dialogue, and I’m watching comedy. We do this a lot– tandem watching, an attempt at togetherness that

banksy 1

love and money

When I saw this film clip of the recent stunt in which Banksy, who’s doing a much-hyped artist’s residency on the streets of New York this month and whose name is being tooted and trumpeted by every loud voice, set

banksy 1

love and money

When I saw this film clip of the recent stunt in which Banksy, who’s doing a much-hyped artist’s residency on the streets of New York this month and whose name is being tooted and trumpeted by every loud voice, set

collage map

forgotten

(…) Is there a sticky residue marking the place where you first fell in love? What if someone died there or cut themselves and bled all over or broke a bone? Does trauma leave a trace? If you lived in a

collage map

forgotten

(…) Is there a sticky residue marking the place where you first fell in love? What if someone died there or cut themselves and bled all over or broke a bone? Does trauma leave a trace? If you lived in a

tree in a tree

organic

(…) For the next eleven years we lived in a quaint old place originally built as a hunting cabin back when mountain lion, bobcat, bear, and elk could be found on Mt.Tamalpais. The living room was the original structure, a

tree in a tree

organic

(…) For the next eleven years we lived in a quaint old place originally built as a hunting cabin back when mountain lion, bobcat, bear, and elk could be found on Mt.Tamalpais. The living room was the original structure, a

head houses

house head

(…this post is continued from here…) My father wanted a bigger house so we moved around the corner to 94 Roosevelt Avenue, a cavernous old haunted thing under deep shade. Even from the outside you could feel the psychic congestion

head houses

house head

(…this post is continued from here…) My father wanted a bigger house so we moved around the corner to 94 Roosevelt Avenue, a cavernous old haunted thing under deep shade. Even from the outside you could feel the psychic congestion

yellow wallpaper

yellow wallpaper

Whenever I see wallpaper, I think of Charlotte Perkins Gilman’s story, The Yellow Wallpaper. I must have been in high school when I first read about the nameless woman whose patronizing doctor-husband confines her to an attic nursery as a

yellow wallpaper

yellow wallpaper

Whenever I see wallpaper, I think of Charlotte Perkins Gilman’s story, The Yellow Wallpaper. I must have been in high school when I first read about the nameless woman whose patronizing doctor-husband confines her to an attic nursery as a

mirror face

me me me me me!

finding truth in the mirror I sat on the edge of the bathtub, staring at the wall. I felt as flat as that wall, flat and covered with an airtight coat of pliant beige latex paint. It must have been

mirror face

me me me me me!

finding truth in the mirror I sat on the edge of the bathtub, staring at the wall. I felt as flat as that wall, flat and covered with an airtight coat of pliant beige latex paint. It must have been

traveling

Road Trip (Stop To Think)

I love a road trip: an open highway, the hypnotic hum of tire against tarmac, a trip so long I forget where I’m going or where I’ve been. Paradoxically, while catapulting down the highway, I am forced to stop and

traveling

Road Trip (Stop To Think)

I love a road trip: an open highway, the hypnotic hum of tire against tarmac, a trip so long I forget where I’m going or where I’ve been. Paradoxically, while catapulting down the highway, I am forced to stop and

close up

messing with my head

The instructions went something like this: The first row goes first. The people stand up, walk single file onto the stage, stop, and turn to face the rest of the group. They will stand at the front edge of the

close up

messing with my head

The instructions went something like this: The first row goes first. The people stand up, walk single file onto the stage, stop, and turn to face the rest of the group. They will stand at the front edge of the